Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize