Pants 0. Shit 1.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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