Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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