this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I just had sex on a roof
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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