Me too!
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
