What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
what day is it and did you see me today?
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
