She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
