I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
