Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize