Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
