my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
