ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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