Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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