vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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