C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
You're like the curious george of whores
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
