i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
