Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I had to cum in my sink.
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