I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize
