another moral hangover. fuck.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize