But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Who died my cat blue again?
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
