you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
