why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
