I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
When are your genitals available?
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
