You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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