Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
