Duck Duck Cougar?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Randomize
