I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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