I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
