The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
