belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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