Already got asked if we're dating
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Operation Purity has been aborted
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
