I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
