trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize