Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
