Michael Bay diarrhea
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
