you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Be still, my beating vagina.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
