we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
