What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
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