Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Alive.
So much puke
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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