Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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