Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize