But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
