Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?

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(760): View more from California

Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha

(1-760): View more from California

I hate my life

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(708): View more from Illinois

so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.

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(716): View more from New York

i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.

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(734): View more from Michigan

I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.

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(416): View more from Toronto

Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career

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(630): View more from Illinois

Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it

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(973): View more from New Jersey

I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.

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