that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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