This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
