Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
