walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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