I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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