well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
