I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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